I have four boys. Sometimes, they are so sweet they can melt your heart. Sometimes, they are bouncing off the walls, and it seems they’ve forgotten every rule you’ve ever made! What’s a parent to do? Certainly follow through with your usual consequences, such as time out. But then what?

I’ve found that often, when your son is in his fifth time out in as many minutes, he needs another form of discipline. He needs the Preemptive Strike.

Instead of waiting for him to throw something else or find a fun use for Mommy’s scissors, do something with him. This is not a reward for bad behavior, it is helping the child regroup and do better.

If he has too much energy and is running through the house, let him serve his consequences and then take him outside for a game of catch. Even 5 minutes will allow him to burn off some steam while encouraging a family bond.

If he is destroying things, scribbling on walls, trying to shave the cat, and poking holes in the cereal box with a fork, give him a purposeful activity. Sit with him and complete a puzzle, or make a castle with blocks and populate it with army men.

Turn that destructive energy into constructive service by cooking together or sorting cans in the pantry. If they’ve made a mess, don’t yell. Help them pick up and make it into a game.

Giving your boys (and girls) a touchstone of time with Mom and Dad also fosters a sense of family and teamwork and helps heal a relationship full of too many “nos”. Many times naughtiness is a mix of wanting attention and not knowing what else to do. You can solve both of these problems with a simple gift of a little time.

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Sleep is definitely one of the most important things in a child’s day. A child who does not get a sufficient amount of sleep is likely to have more trouble concentrating. Consequently, lack of sleep also can lead to poor behavior. It is important to note that the amount of sleep a child needs changes over time. One to three-year-olds should get from twelve to fourteen hours per day, this includes the typical naps. Three to six year-olds need nearly 11 to 12. Seven to twelve-year-olds need 10 to 11 hours, while twelve to eighteen year-olds should get eight and a quarter to nine and a half.

As a parent, it is important that you establish a consistent bedtime routine that gets your child an adequate amount of sleep. Here are some tips:

• Half an hour before bedtime, keep the activities quiet, so the children can settle down.
• Avoid caffeinated products with dinner.
• Try reading with your child as part of the routine. It will help create a calm mood as well as be a time for connection and learning. Try to avoid watching TV.
• Consider including bath time as part of the bedtime routine.
• If a child refuses to sleep, create fair consequences.
• You can feel free to allow a nightlight or soft music.

It is important to try to leave the room before your child has actually fallen asleep. If he/she becomes accustomed to you being in the room, this habit might become hard to break and will lead to problems in the future.

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Generally speaking, I have semi-adventuresome eaters in my four kids.  My wife and I are foodies to the nth degree- we eat everything and will try cooking in any style.  So, our children get all of our experiments.  But sometimes when you are at a restaurant, nothing saves you as a parent like the power of chicken nuggets.

Chicken nuggets, fingers, or strips (they go by so many names) are the fool-proof child meal at a restaurant. Almost every American parent knows this, and almost every restaurant knows this.  So, from Thai restaurants to seafood shacks, you will find the stalwart savior on the kids’ menu.

On a recent dinner trip to Silver Spring Mining Company in Belair, Maryland, two of my kids proved that to be true again.  They ordered the chicken strips, and I got my sour beef and dumplings.  Jake and Kate often order other things there, but for whatever reason, they had their minds on the simple chicken world.  And because it was on the menu, there was harmony at the table.

God bless chicken nuggets and the role they play in parenting.

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Nowadays, a lot of people are struggling financially because of the downturn in the economy. Consumer spending is curbed because people are saving their money for rainy days. But for moms and dads, the situation can become complicated when they are shopping with the kids. Parents always think twice before indulging in their favorite restaurant or buying new shoes for themselves. However, when their kids ask for something, their hearts inevitably melt, and they can’t say no to their kids.

No matter how trivial the item is, parents’ often don’t want to disappoint the child. It is important to realize though, that these types of gestures might be more harmful over the long term. No one can say that overindulgence is a good thing. And this is what you’ll be doing if you buy your kids everything they want at the expense of your financial health. Even if you’re not struggling financially, it is still essential for your kids to learn the value of money early.

Talk to other parents – getting outside advice can be helpful in letting you know where you should draw the line. You can talk with other parents on how all of you can discipline your children. Friends have a big impact on what youngsters want to buy.

Thrift isn’t deprivation – being thrifty doesn’t mean you’re depriving your kids of their needs. It is important to emphasize that it is not necessary to overspend in order to become a good parent.

Set an example – if your kids see you buying everything in sight, they will follow your example today and in the future. So set a good precedent for discipline and thriftiness.

Splurge occasionally – buy something that is extra special.  However, don’t make this an every shopping trip event.  If it is done infrequently, your child won’t expect you to indulge in such a fashion and will appreciate your generosity.

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My husband and I took two of our children shopping for new school clothes this past weekend.  As they are both middle school students, they both are fashion conscious.  However, I am not willing to spend an exorbidant amount of money on clothing that they will outgrow in a few months.  So, while driving to a local mall, I explained that we could shop at the “cool” stores, but items bought there probably would need to be on sale for us to purchase them.

We decided to shop in the aforementioned cool stores before shopping in less desirable stores.  That handled two issues:  1. It would allow us to see if clothing items they wanted were available at reasonable prices before settling for other items.  2.  It would allow the kids to compare items by price.

At this mall, there were three or four stores at which the kids wanted to shop.  The first store was a complete miss, as neither one found anything in his or her size or at a reasonable price.  The second store was a bigger success.  Both kids found t-shirts in the clearance area.  However, as we live in the northeast, long-sleeved clothing is needed more, and this is where bending the rules comes into play.  My daughter found a beautiful sweater that wasn’t on sale and was more than we typically would spend.  However, she absolutely loved it, and it was well made, so we decided to purchase it.  To keep the score even, our son was given the same freedom, and he excitedly chose a striped dress shirt he had been eyeing longingly.

Some might say that the decision to purchase items that we had said we wouldn’t was overindulgent.  However, I disagree.  It was within our means to purchase these items.  The kids had to follow the reasonable price rule for the rest of their purchases.  What is the harm in that?  If anything, the kids have learned that we follow rules but occasionally allow for exceptions.  Isn’t that how life works?

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