Recently, in my English class, we were discussing what the rules for cell phones in school should be.  I believe that cell phones should be banned in school for they cause a multitude of problems.

Now, many parents believe students should carry cell phones in school because students need them for emergencies and getting picked up, but there are more down-sides than up-sides.  For example, texting in an emergency could cause a fatal panic. Imagine if all the parents showed up at a school because of a fire.  There would be no room for emergency workers and teachers to evacuate the kids!  Also, texting of a false emergency could cause a similar panic and other problems.

Classes would be heavily distracted, too.  Have you ever sat next to a talkative toddler on a four-hour plane flight?  Having a kid texting in class would be like that.  All you would hear is his or her phone chime repeatedly in the middle of the lesson and them talking on calls!  Also, kids would learn much less because  of distractions from talking and texting.

Finally, students could spread rumors and gossip around schools as fast as light!  Having a rumor spread about you is bad, so imagine if everyone knew it at once.  It would be horrible!  Also, kids could cheat off of tests by texting others the answer. Sure, you can use it as a calculator, but what about tests with no calculator rules!  There would be no stopping the rule-breaking.

Many school have made anti-cell phone rules to prevent these problems, though.  At first, in the early nineties, most schools banned cell phones. After the incident at Columbine, debate over students and cell phones increased. With the events of 9-11, some states allowed student cell phones, which allowed school districts to decide whether or not to give this privilege to their students.  Most schools have made an anti-cell phone rule, with support from the teachers.

At my school, phones are banned, although in my grade the rule is loosely enforced.  Also, most kids rebel.   Over eighty percent of students in my grade carries cell phones (turned on)  in school.

So, the question is, how do you feel about the issue?

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You do everything that you can to parent your child properly. You teach them the appropriate values, language, and manners. You try to be a role model in your speech, actions, and attitudes. But you can never completely shield them from the example set by others.

This point was brought home to me at the beach this weekend. While my son frolicked in the water with the other kids, some of the parents stood around yapping at the shoreline. One felt the need to start virtually every sentence with a 4-letter slang term for feces. Another butchered the English language with such gems as “Who ball dat is?” A third held her lit cigarette in the same hand that she used to drag her three year old around the beach.

Much as I wanted to tell that first young woman to watch her language in front of the kids, I knew that I couldn’t for two reasons. One – it would probably have sent her off on an obscenity-laden rampage far worse than what she had subjected us to. Two – you just can’t talk to people about their parenting.

Funny thing about our culture – you can criticize people for a lot of things, but you just can’t question anyone’s parenting skills. Nobody is a bad parent, even if they have unmistakably bad children. Yes, kids make their own choices, but parents set the boundaries. Parents set and enforce the consequences. Parents are the example and the guiding force in the lives of their children.

Whenever I see a young offender on the evening news for committing some heinous act, I can’t help but wonder where the parents are. How do kids get so far off track by 13 or 14 years old? The answer, unpopular as it may be in politically-correct modern America, is the parents.

So, we’re back to where we started. We look around and see parents are failing their children at an alarming rate. But it seems that all we can do is be the best parents we can be to our own children.

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I am now in my fourth year of being a dad, and I have learned some things that I would like to share with other dads who are just starting out . I am far from being the veteran dad with all the parenting wisdom; four years is too short a time to learn everything there is to learn about parenthood. But the little things I’ve learned would be useful to those who are groping in the dark, so here they are :

1. Parenting made me see things within me that I did not see before. It made me know myself deeper. The deeper I get into parenthood, the deeper I know myself.

2. Parenting is not exactly like what you read in “parenting” books. Every child is unique, every family is one-of-a-kind; you have to weave what you read with what your instinct tells you to come up with the best fabric on which to paint the unique story of your child.

3. Parenting problems are opportunities for learning. Parenthood would not be complete without the hurdles that need to be faced by a parent everyday.

4. Actions speak louder than words. A child learns more from what he sees  than from what he hears, so it pays to learn how to master one’s actions. The key to mastering one’s actions is in the mastery of oneself.

5. A good parent must know how to take good care of himself and stay fit. A sick parent would not be able to give good loving.

6. It pays to have a vision of what we want our child to be in the future, but it doesn’t mean to say that we need to stick with that vision no matter what happens along the way. Time and growing up have a tricky way of changing directions, so be ready to adjust and change the shape of your child’s future according to what your child wants.

7. Every minute you are with your child is an opportunity to show him how much you love him. I can not tell you how it’s done, each of us has his  own way of expressing it, just follow your instinct.

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I come to you with only Karate, my empty hands. I have no weapons, but should I be forced to defend myself, my principles or my honor; should it be a matter of life or death, of right or wrong; then here are my weapons: Karate, my empty hands.  These words are the basis of American Kenpo, a martial art I feel is very good for kids to study.

Most importantly, Kenpo teaches you self defense.  This helps your kids in the case of a crime, if they are bullied, and many more incidents.  The need for an effective method for your kids to protect themselves in today’s often hostile and violent environment is very real.  Also, the study of American Kenpo will boost your child’s physical coordination immensely.  Self confidence and a positive mental attitude are acquired in the lessons of Kenpo, along-with self-discipline and determination to move on.  Finally, today’s lifestyles have become increasingly sedentary for kids. With television increasingly occupying more and more of many children’s time, physical inactivity becomes an ever present concern of interested parents. The study of Kenpo is a very invigorating endeavor that enables your kids to create and build energy in a focused and directed manner.

At my school, Granite State American Kenpo, classes are set up like this. The teen and adult class is for ages thirteen and older, the kids class is six through twelve, and the preschool class is ages three and a half and up.  Prices are reasonable, and if your teacher feels you are ready, you can join a club for motivated learners.  Also, there are family bonuses for families who go together.  One of my best friend’s whole family goes, so three out of the four of them train together.

So, if your child is unruly, bullied, out of shape, or without direction, he or she should try Kenpo.

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Every child is unique and learns in a particular way. There are three basic styles of learning: visual, auditory, and kinesthetic. Most children’s learning styles are a combination of two or all of these basic styles. It is important to know your child’s learning style to make it easier for you to help him strengthen his skills in the areas where he is weakest. But how do you know your child’s learning style?

It helps to know that most children begin as kinesthetic learners. We humans first learn by direct involvement, by touching, and by doing. By the age of four or five, the learning style of a child begins to take shape and become discernible.

My child is now four years old, and I guess his learning style is a combination of all of the three learning styles but favoring the visual learning style. I can say that he uses all three learning styles because it shows every single day. I can safely say that he is comfortable with the auditory style of learning because he enjoys  conversations a lot and often cannot wait for his turn to talk. He invents songs of his own. He can go on and on singing a melody that he invents out of the blue, grabbing words here and there, unmindful of the meaning. He is also very good at following verbal instructions.

But he’s also a kinesthetic learner because he prefers action stories, and when he talks he uses a lot of gestures to help explain his thoughts. He finds it easy to interpret music into a dance. He cannot resist music, and he invents his own dance when there is music.

But I’m quite sure that he’s more of a visual learner because he learns best when something is shown to him, how something is done.

How about you, do you know your child’s learning style? While your child is still young, determine her learning style. Knowing your child’s learning style could help in selecting a school or teacher for her.

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