It started innocently enough.  The three year old, Lex, who normally has enough energy to power a small city, was pooped out.  ”Everyone gets tired,” I said, “even our little Energizer Bunny.”  My lovely wife was unconvinced.

The next day he had a fever.  Up to 103 it went.  ”He’s got the flu,” I said in my reassuring voice.  ”He’ll be fine in a couple of days.”  My lovely wife thought otherwise.

The next day, his fever still was bopping up and down, from a pleasant 99 to a worrisome 103.  We looked up the swine flu online.  Lex had about half the symptoms.  I said, “Well, it’s not swine flu, he’s only got half the symptoms.”  My lovely wife said “It’s swine flu!  He’s got half the symptoms!”

The Tylenol didn’t do much to lower his fever.  ”Take him to the pediatrician,” I said in my authoritative voice that I use to cover up the fact that she’s just going to do it anyway.  ”He’ll probably just tell us to keep him hydrated like he usually does.”  My lovely wife didn’t think so.

The doctor looked at Lex for all of seven seconds before declaring, “He’s got the swine flu.”  He didn’t say H1N1, like the World Health Organization (WHO) wants us to.  He said “swine flu”.  My lovely wife agreed.

They did a rapid flu test.  It involved sticking a giant Q-Tip down Lex’s throat.  Our pediatrician is always doing things like that, which is probably why Lex hates going there.  The test results came back in a couple of hours.  It was negative for swine flu.  My pediatrician disagreed.  Who knew that rapid tests have a high false positive rate?

The morals of the story:

1) My lovely wife should make all the healthcare decisions for our family.

2) Rapid testing must be a good job.  Nobody is surprised if you’re completely wrong.

3) ”Swine flu” is rapidly becoming a very scary term.  Although all our friends expressed sympathy (on the phone), nobody came to visit us all week.  Maybe that’s why the WHO wants us to say “H1N1 Virus”.  Somehow it’s less scary.

PS – He’s better now, thanks for asking.

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Fighting among siblings or playmates is a natural part of being a child. If you think that it is not right for a child to sometimes pick a fight with one of his siblings or playmates, then you are quite wrong.  Fights are part and parcel of being a child, and it is a sign that your child is growing up naturally. Of course, we do not feel good when we see our children fighting and want to prevent fighting as much as possible. Here are some tips on how to prevent or nip a fight in the bud.

If the fight is already going on and you see that it is not really that deep a fight, you can choose to ignore it. There are times when kids use fighting to get your attention. Fights like this will die down naturally when ignored. Of course, you need to know how to see if a fight is bad or just light enough to be ignored safely.

Never be partial and never take sides when you try to break a kiddie fight. As much as possible, do not attempt to get into who started the fight and who is wrong. Some kids are quite creative and may become manipulative and in future fights know how to get what they want.

When your kids are not fighting, make sure that you let them know that you are happy that they are behaving well. You must give your attention to them every time they behave nicely, not only when they are behaving badly and fighting.

When you and your spouse quarrel, do your best not to show it to your children. And when it cannot be avoided that they see, be sure that they also see how good you are at handling the quarrel and at patching up. Your children will learn from the examples you show them.

Show your children how important cooperation is in the family. Do things together, make little projects together with the whole family. Your children will learn that with cooperation almost anything can be achieved. When they understand the beauty of cooperation, fighting would be lessened.

Show your kids how to love each other by loving them. The best way to teach love is by loving.

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Kids love summertime and the freedom it brings. Moms, not so much. Finding ways to entertain the children all day can be taxing on mom and on the budget. But there are some ways to take the strain off both.

A number of restaurants offer free kids meals on certain nights of the week.  In our area, just about every night is covered by at least one restaurant.  Sixty-nine cent cheeseburger Wednesday at McDonald’s is a popular lunch stop. Even though the savings don’t amount to all that much (I think cheeseburgers are ninety-five cents every other day), every Wednesday huge numbers of parents with young children flock to the one local McDonald’s that still has a playland.

Many movie theaters have started showing FREE movies on weekday mornings.  Our Cobb theater has two free kids movies each week, showing at 10AM on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.  If you can convince your children that they do not need twelve bucks worth of snacks to watch a movie, then free morning movies are a great way to get out of the house without breaking the bank.

Children’s museums are another good activity for summertime.  Many will offer an annual family pass, which is a huge bargain compared to paying single day admission at most other venues.  For $60, our family has unlimited access to the children’s museum, which is good for entertaining once a week all summer without getting dull.

There are always free events being hosted here and there in any given city.  Books-a-Million is currently offering free kids activities on Saturday mornings all summer.  While they haven’t been spectacular, you can’t beat the price and the kids sure seem to have fun.

While these events will help to keep the kids entertained without breaking the bank, mom is sure to be extra weary throughout the summer.  Dad needs to step in and have some extra ‘date nights’ with the kids during the evenings, just to give mom a break.  As the saying goes, “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.”   It’s a grammatical nightmare, but it’s true.

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Recently, I was offered a larger room because I am the oldest and I have the smallest room in the house.  I currently am debating if I should take the offer, but I am almost positive I will.  So, I thought, what are some good room change guidelines and ideas?

Here are some guidelines to changing rooms.

1. Run a “trial night”.  Have the child sleep in the room for one or two days.  Don’t bring in all the furniture, just use an air mattress and sheets or a sleeping bag, and a nightlight, if needed.  This allows you to see if the child will sleep in the room.   No point in moving into the room just to move out because the kid can’t sleep.
2. Watch for backlash.  If the child’s new room-to-be is currently the playroom and the child’s current room is smaller, when the rooms are swapped any other kids may feel swindled because they now have a smaller playroom just because one kid got a bigger room.
3. Are they old enough or too old???  At a young age, things like room size aren’t important, so they don’t need the change.  At an older age, it may not be worth it because the older teen is probably moving out soon.  I think there is an area of age that fits the bill well: eight to fourteen.
4. After moving in…  Before moving in tell the child that a larger room comes with responsibilities.  He or she will need to clean the room, and to many kids, that ruins the joy.  Also, things like having a larger room will mean all your toys go in your room, but shared toys don’t go in your room.
5. Keep the change quiet.  Don’t tell all the kids until there is a verdict (made by the child and parents), and then, only if it’s a yes.  If you tell them early or if it’s a no, the other kids may ask, too. Then they may get mad if you say no because they feel you are being mean by only offering it to one child.

So, if one of your children wants a bigger room, think carefully about it.  And, feel free to use my guidelines.

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As I am writing this, it is the 4th of July back in the United States, a day where we celebrate our independence from the tyranny of England since 1776.  Meanwhile, I am deployed to the Middle East in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom and Operation Enduring Freedom.  I can’t help but think of all those who sacrifice so much to ensure we will still celebrate independence in the years to come.

Where I am is a very safe location and far from the action.  However, as I watch my military brothers and sisters go deeper into the fight I can’t help but think of their families.  It is not a fun experience to be away from my family for four months, but there are many who will be gone for over a year at a time.  Imagine leaving your family knowing you won’t see them again for a very long time.  I can’t even begin to imagine a whole year.

The ironic thing is that these men and women are fighting not just for the security of our nation but for other nations to have the ability to celebrate their freedom one day.  Iraq is already able to breathe free from the removal of a dictator.  There are many families that can celebrate the day his tyrannic thumb was lifted from their lives.

233 years ago there were those who opted to leave their families to join the masses and fight for our freedom.  Not knowing when they would be home, they still stepped up to fight.  I am honored and humbled to wear the same uniform and represent the same flag for which they bled.

The 4th of July has grown to become one of my favorite holidays after my time in Iraq five years ago.  Knowing that I play a tiny part in helping another family burn burgers and enjoy their independence takes the sting out of not being there to do the same with my family this year.  I hope and pray that one day my child will grow to understand freedom is not free.

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