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When Do You Know You’re Ready?

by Editorial Team | November 6th, 2013 | Teen Perspective, Teens

couple at sunsetThis may be a very risqué article, but bear with me.  As a teenager it can be overwhelming with all the things you are told.  Specifically pertaining to premarital sex.  If you are a teenager in a relationship, you may feel pressured to do things you usually wouldn’t.  But in a good relationship, you shouldn’t feel pressured to do anything.  You should just feel ready.  I know you’re probably thinking, “Wait, I’m asking you when I’m ready and you’re saying it’s when I feel ready?”  Sure it’s confusing, but you just know.

If you have to ask yourself if you are ready, you aren’t.  When you’re ready you will know.  You shouldn’t feel pressured to do anything for your partner.  If you don’t want to, then don’t.  It’s your body’s self-aware way of telling itself that it isn’t ready.  My mom used to always tell me that I shouldn’t have sex until I was ready to have kids.  I feel like this is an overstatement.  You may be ready to have intercourse with your partner, but that doesn’t mean you are ready to have children.  But it is a good thing to have in the back of your mind since protection is never 100% effective.

Speaking of protection, use it.  Always, and I mean always, use a condom.  And girls, get on that BC because you get pregnant, not your guy.  There are many different types of birth control, all with different levels of effectiveness.  The pill is the most commonly used birth control, but it has the lowest rate of effectiveness.  Since it only works if it is taken every day at the same time, and many women forget that, its rate is around 91%.  But if it can be taken at the same time every day it has a rate of 99%, it will also regulate your monthly cycle due to levels of estrogen in it.  Be wary though, if you smoke or are hitting middle age it can cause blood clots.  There is also a shot you can take every few months that has an effectiveness of around 98%.  The last type of BC is another shot.  Well, it is more of an injection.  A sort of matchstick (don’t worry, it is smaller than an actual match) is injected into your upper arm and has an effectiveness of about 99.5%.  It also works for three to four years.

Another thing to keep in mind is that if both of you are under 16 (at least in the state of NH, be sure to check your state’s laws) either, or both, of you can be charged with rape if sexual actions were to occur.  In the United States the age ranges from 16 to 18.  I know this won’t stop many of you, but be sure that nobody would press charges if you were to go forward with your actions of sexual intent.

Whatever you do, never allow yourself to be pressured into something you don’t want to do.  If you are being pressured,  chances are they aren’t the right person for you.  You need to feel comfortable with your partner and when you’re ready, you’ll know.

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