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Solution: Inappropriate Gifts

by Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil | July 27th, 2012 | Parenting Predicament
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What should you do if your teen daughter is given an inappropriate gift (like lingerie) by a friend or the friend’s parent? Talk to the parent? Just not let your daughter keep the gift?

Family therapist Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil suggests the following:

I would first talk with the teen who gave the present (with your teen present) in a curious but non-threatening, non-accusatory way. If the parent was the gift giver, I’d ask her, after thanking her for her thoughtfulness, if she’d mind if you exchanged it for something less grown up, and she’ll get the idea and explain that gift was for someone older. Assess if the friend is of the right crowd for your child. Your morals may be different and your values may be different. Explain to your teen that you don’t feel comfortable. You want her to enjoy her teenage years and not grow up so fast.

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