Having a cast really stinks, for those of you who haven’t had one.  They’re hot, sweaty, and downright smelly.  They itch a lot, too.  So, if one of your kids ever has a cast, don’t harass them for complaining.  Don’t let them whine incessantly, but there’s no point in harassment for a little complaint.  Casts aren’t fun.

Try to help your child out.  Since I only have one hand and a thumb to work with currently, daily tasks are a pain in the rump.  It takes me two minutes to put on jeans.  Typing this article took twice as long.  I still cannot cut and butter a bagel.  So, help your child out a little.  If you don’t, they might end up dropping plates everywhere. At the same time, don’t baby them.  I don’t mind a little help, but being treated like I can’t use either hand is kind of insulting.

If your child plays high school sports, be ready to accommodate for them still playing.  Currently, I am still practicing, I just cannot use my upper left extremity.  I can still run, stretch, do abdominal workouts, and do jumping jacks with the team.  When the team is wrestling, I ride a stationery bicycle with a teammate who is also injured.  In a week I will be returning to the doctor’s for an x-ray.  If all goes well, he will clear me to wrestle for the remainder of the season.  I will simply have to wrap the cast in foam padding to prevent injury to myself or others.  So, if your child is wearing a cast as a high school athlete, don’t expect them to drop the sport.

Here’s my part for the kids:

• Wake up 5 minutes earlier in the morning.  It will make your routine a heck of a lot easier.
• Ask your parents to buy the shower bag.  Your life will get a lot easier.
• Take a sweatshirt that you really don’t like, and cut a sleeve off of it.  If you have any sweatshirts that don’t have elastics in the wrists, you can wear these without a problem.  If you wear a sweatshirt that you like that has elastics in the wrists, it will stretch the wrist and ruin it.  (I have no clue about broken legs; do a Google search.)
• When you are carrying a lunch tray, ask a friend to help.  You don’t want to end up spilling it and looking like a fool.
•  When you are going to bed at night, try to keep the broken limb pointed somewhat away from the rest of the body.  Otherwise you might roll over on it and hurt it.
• The doctor might tell you that tapping on your cast will make the itching go away; it doesn’t really work.

Having a cast really stinks.

You can’t let projects get the better of you; it’s not worth the energy.  It doesn’t matter how much you just want to smash the project and start jumping on it, you can’t.  All that will do is cause more frustration.  And then you will just have to start again from square one, and do everything all over again.

When you’re at the maximum point of frustration, the best thing to do it step back, take a deep breath, and ask for help.  It doesn’t matter how much you don’t want to, you need to.  When you are frustrated you can’t always see straight.  And when you can’t see straight, you will most likely ruin your project in hopes of, what you think is, salvaging it from its depths of ruination.  Little do you know, it was already fine before and right now you are just making it worse.  And, if you ask for help, the person helping you could give you a better idea or perspective on your project, and help you succeed.  And isn’t that what everyone wants to do with their life?  Don’t you want to succeed?  I sure know I do.  So whether it’s science, math, or Spanish, remember that when that huge cloud of frustration blocks your view, you probably need someone to help you find your way.

• Studying really depends on the individual.  I would never tell anyone they have to study before a test, because I almost never study for anything.  The only tests I have studied for since I entered high school are English and Spanish tests.  So, instead, I will suggest that you consider your own capabilities and then decide if you need to study or not.  No matter who you are, don’t embark on last minute cram sessions.  Although I’m not going to be the biggest advocate for studying for weeks prior to the test, last minute cramming is equally as dumb.  Your brain will need time to soak in the knowledge.
• Try to get a good night’s sleep the night before.  I am stressing the word try, because I know it can be hard to get one as a busy high school student.  The night before my first day of finals, I got home at 10:30 from a wrestling meet.  I didn’t fall asleep until midnight on that night.  At the same time, if you don’t have important things to do, don’t stay up late for no reason.
• Eat breakfast.  First of all, note that I said eat breakfast, not eat a good breakfast.  I personally don’t eat anything special on final days, I just eat whatever I usually eat.  I always eat breakfast, but for those who don’t always, you should.  It will help keep you focused and energized.  If you don’t eat breakfast, you will be distracted by hunger.  Also, be careful with energy drinks.  Make sure whatever you drink won’t result in you crashing in the middle of the test.
• Chew gum before or during the test.  I personally chew a lot of gum, especially during test.  Well, it seems to have paid off.  According to WebMD, researchers have found that gum can help test scores:  “In the study, researchers compared the effects of chewing gum before or during various testing situations in a group of about 80 undergraduate students.  The results showed students who chewed gum for five minutes before a test performed better than those who didn’t. But the benefits of chewing gum were short-lived, lasting only about 15 to 20 minutes into the test.”

Whenever you (or your child) are preparing for finals, feel free to keep these tips in mind.  Just don’t do a last minute cram session on these tips…

My oh my, how the years fly. On, August 21, 2008, I posted my very first article on Your Parenting Info from the teen perspective. I remember the article clearly, as if I wrote it yesterday, though it was nearly three and half years ago. This post will be my 46th and final post on YPI from the teen perspective; I’m turning 20 later this month!

Saying farewell to the YPI community gives me a lot to think about. Do I still agree with my perspective three years ago? What do my posts say about how I’ve changed? It’s been quite an experience, getting a chance to analyze actions my parents have made, for better or for worse. Who would have thought that there would be an audience other than my sister who would listen to a teen’s perspective on different aspects of parenting?

My first article, “How Far is Too Far?” was about the adverse effects of severely restricting “unhealthy food” in one’s household. I grew up in a household where soda and candies were regarded as treats that we could have on special occasions, and I still feel the same way; I don’t go out and buy cookies for dinner, even though I could. I wrote about a friend who was raised in a household where junk foods were completely banned, and how I thought that this was a terrible idea. At the time, my friend would splurge on junk foods whenever he got the chance outside of his house, a bad consequence of a complete restriction. However, I’ve also met people in college who don’t eat junk foods at all, because that was how they were raised (like my other friend) and they feel no reason to stray from their norm. So now I’ve seen results on both ends of the spectrum. The only thing that is truly clear is that parenting is not an exact science.

Over the years I’ve commented on many family matters: allowances, bedtime, family dinners, and volunteering. My articles also form a rough timeline for my most recent teen years (college visits, prom, college decisions, getting a dog, being a college athlete, etc.).  In April 2010 I posed my situation of choosing which college to attend. I don’t think I ever mentioned that I eventually chose Option C, and halfway through my sophomore year, I couldn’t be happier and have no regrets!

I can’t believe my teen years are coming to a close! It’s been a pleasure, writing from the teen perspective here on YPI.

All the best,

Louise

• Sleepovers on school nights require mature children.  Having a sleepover on a school night with young kids will result in an absolute disaster the next day.  Young (or immature) kids will stay up too late and be wrecks the next day at school.  Even if they are well behaved, young kids need a lot of sleep and will still probably not get enough.  Older kids will go to bed at an appropriate time or at least be able to handle the consequences at school the next day.
• Try to control what they are eating and drinking.  As a general rule, I don’t consume caffeinated beverages after about 7 P.M. on school nights.  Although they don’t normally affect me, sometimes they do, so I try to avoid it.  Similar rules should be considered on school night sleepovers.  If they aren’t, lack of sleep could be a major problem.
• Try to consider what the kids will need to pack.  For example, I am not bringing a sleeping bag because I would have to bring it to school the next day.  Rather, I’m just packing my clothes into my wrestling bag and bringing my backpack too.  This seemed to be the simplest answer to that dilemma.

Sleepovers on school nights may seem to be complicated and a pain in the rump, but there are some situations (like the BCS National Championship Game or the Super Bowl) where it is completely worth the hassle.

In the past years, New Year’s Eve has had one of the highest pregnancy rates.  By that I mean that it is one of the likeliest days that women get pregnant.  Women and girls forget all the prepping they have gotten on having safe sex.  They completely forget to use condoms and, a fair amount of the time, they forget to take their birth control.  Which is very terrible because if it is not taken every single day, at almost the exact same time, it is very unlikely to work as well as if you did do that.  If you skip one day of birth control, the chances of pregnancy go from about 2% to about 25%.

Alcohol poisoning.  New Year’s Eve is one of the worst nights for alcohol poisoning.  All the miserable, lonely, single people who think this day is worthless because they are alone go to the bars and drink until they can’t see straight.  They then start feeling queasy so they go to the bathroom.  Where they then pass out and self-asphyxiate on their own vomit.  Do you realize how few people actually realize they are choking and wake up, just barely saving themselves from death?  Very few people.

Also, driving while under the influence.  That too is very dangerous.  Not only can you injure yourself, you can hurt the people around you and the people around you that you don’t know.  It is so dangerous to drive while intoxicated.  Not to mention illegal.

Now, I don’t want to end on a sad note.  So to sum up this “lecture” on the dangers of New Year’s Eve. I want to tell you that this night isn’t all dangers, it is also filled with good natured, loving fun.  Here is my advice, stay home and surround yourself with friends.  And if you are under 21 don’t drink, it is dangerous and illegal.  So as long as you are careful, enjoy yourself.  As a teenager I love this night, it is one of my favorite holidays.  And that is because I follow my own advice.

• Do thy homework.  I know homework sucks.  I hate doing homework myself.  The fact of the matter is that even though it sucks, you still have to do it.  There are loads of people who do not like doing regular tasks like cleaning.  That is no reason to live in a filthy house.  Depending on the class you are taking, homework may be an important part of your grade.
• Find out what the rules are.  I have several classes where my homework counts for zero percent of my grade.  In other words, you do not have to do it.  That doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter though .  Often, teachers will have open note tests with the exact questions from the homework  — to see who did the homework.  Also, at my school, in order to get a retake for a test, you must have done all homework for the section or chapter.
• Get it done when and how you want to.  I know that teachers are constantly advocating that homework should be done at home.  Well, that’s a load of bull.  If we are handed a paper before or during a lecture, I do it right there in class.  I do almost half my homework in my study hall and I even do some before school after the bus drops me off.  Also, procrastination is okay to some degree.  I don’t think many people want to come home from school and immediately begin to do homework.  Between sports and procrastination, I don’t always start until 8 p.m.  But it gets done.

It doesn’t matter when or where you do your homework, as long as it is done well and on time.  That’s the moral of the story.  Because the teachers only care about the end product, not the means used to make it.

I’m a first generation American. My parents moved to the States from the Netherlands (well, technically they moved from France, but that’s a different story) about 20 years ago. One of the biggest cultural factors that my parents brought with them to America is the Dutch language. Frankly, it’s pretty darn cool to be raised in a bilingual household. I mean, how many people do you know that can speak Dutch? It’s like a secret language for my sisters and me (except of course when we visit our family in Holland). One of the traditions that my parents brought with them to America is the celebration of Sinterklaasavond (Saint Nicholas’s Eve) or pakjesavond (night of gifts) on December 5, which we like to call Dutch Christmas.

Sinterklaas is essentially the Dutch version of Santa Claus. (Christmas is also celebrated in Holland, but is more of a religious occasion, than a time to give gifts.) On the night before December 5, children put out their shoes or klompen (wooden clogs) by the fireplace (analogous to stockings), leaving a carrot/apple out for Sinterklaas’ horse. The next morning, traditional items that fill the shoes include kruidnoten (small, spiced cookies, pictured), speculaas, taai-taai, perhaps a mandarin orange, and other treats. That night, Sinterklaas and his helper, Zwarte Piet, leave a sack of gifts by the front door, though no one ever sees them come or go. For my family, it’s an exciting night filled with gift-giving and Sinterklaasliedtjes (Dutch Christmas songs).

Some might claim, “My family has been living in America for many generations. I don’t have anything else special to celebrate.” Many Caucasian Americans vaguely know their background. I’ve heard many friends say something along the lines of, “I’m 50% French, 25% German, and 25% something else.” If you know that much, you could set aside a particular day each year just to, as a family, look into where your family came from (not just locations, but traditions). If your roots only trace you further back into America, then that’s something else special to celebrate as well.

Doing some research to find out a special holiday that would be relevant for your family to celebrate provides a valuable cultural lesson and adds an extra day of celebration to the year. Now that’s what I call a win-win situation.

(U.S. Air Force photo)

I don’t think dieting is a necessary step for most scenarios.  There are many situations where it is immediately thought of as the primary cure for obesity or other unhealthy conditions.  Here are the only two scenarios where I think it should be considered immediately.

• Extreme obesity.  When people see or know an obese person, they instantly think that that person needs to go onto a diet.  When it comes to kids, I do not think that it should be the first choice in most cases.  Exercising should be the first change for obese children.  Most obese kids simply do not get outside and exercise enough.  Sadly, many people simply implement a diet plan and assume that will work.  Well, if a kid diets but parks his rear in front of a screen all day long, then there is no point in the diet.  On the other hand, if he exercises and does not diet, he will probably lose some weight.  In cases of severe obesity, doing both is necessary.
• Any time a child needs to lose weight rapidly.  I know this sounds unhealthy, but it is necessary for some kids, primarily athletes.  I can think of two sports off the top of my head that require weight loss, wrestling and football.  Dieting is an important part of wrestling, because you need to lose weight quickly (before the season starts).  Not all football requires weight loss, but I know that many youth football leagues have weight limits, so if you want to play at a certain age level, you need to lose weight.  This is not true in all places or at all levels.

Although I wouldn’t suggest dieting for most kids, there are situations where it is necessary.  Next time, I am going to talk about how you should be dieting.

I personally think they are a great way to communicate and work on school projects.  Or, say you do drama, you could get a group of kids together and study the script.  As long as you only are friends with people you know, I think it is personally fine to have an Oovoo or Skype account.  As any social networking account is, video chatting is all about being smart. If Kyle friends you on Oovoo and you have no clue who he is, obviously don’t accept it.  And if you are in a group video call with some friends, and someone brings someone else and they start bringing other people, signal to the original few people that you don’t want all of these people (if you don’t want them all on) and create a different call.

I always say, if you feel uncomfortable doing something, don’t do it.  And the same goes for video chatting.  If there is someone on the call making you feel uncomfortable, make sure your friend knows, and then either make that person leave, or leave yourself.  And if your friend gets mad at you for doing that, tell them that you didn’t feel comfortable. If they are a true friend, they should understand.  Ya know, it is all about making smart moves and not doing anything ludicrously stupid things, because if you do, your parents do have the right to take away your video chatting privileges.

Speaking of parents, do not go behind their back and get an account without their permission.  It’s reckless, somewhat unethical, and can get you in lots of trouble.  If your parents don’t want you to have an account, then listen to them.  Don’t go behind their back and make one against their rules; chances are they have a perfectly good reason for not letting you get one and since you went behind their back, when they find out, you will be in loads of trouble.