• Sleepovers on school nights require mature children.  Having a sleepover on a school night with young kids will result in an absolute disaster the next day.  Young (or immature) kids will stay up too late and be wrecks the next day at school.  Even if they are well behaved, young kids need a lot of sleep and will still probably not get enough.  Older kids will go to bed at an appropriate time or at least be able to handle the consequences at school the next day.
• Try to control what they are eating and drinking.  As a general rule, I don’t consume caffeinated beverages after about 7 P.M. on school nights.  Although they don’t normally affect me, sometimes they do, so I try to avoid it.  Similar rules should be considered on school night sleepovers.  If they aren’t, lack of sleep could be a major problem.
• Try to consider what the kids will need to pack.  For example, I am not bringing a sleeping bag because I would have to bring it to school the next day.  Rather, I’m just packing my clothes into my wrestling bag and bringing my backpack too.  This seemed to be the simplest answer to that dilemma.

Sleepovers on school nights may seem to be complicated and a pain in the rump, but there are some situations (like the BCS National Championship Game or the Super Bowl) where it is completely worth the hassle.

I was talking with her last night and I told her straight out: don’t stress out about the dance.  As fun as they are, it isn’t something to freak out about.  Just wear normal clothing, don’t get all stressed out about it; it isn’t worth it.  If you do, you will be exhausted by Friday and will probably be too tired to go, and you don’t want that.

I still remember my first dance, I had my outfit planned for weeks.  I am just so glad that I, too, had a friend that was two years older than me that could give me the same advice I gave my friend.  By the time I got out of the dance I was exhausted. I had just had 2 1/2 hours of gymnastics before, but that’s not the point.  My point is that you need a good night’s sleep the night before — don’t stay up all night thinking about the dance.  If you do, the dance won’t be any fun at all.  Believe me, I was falling asleep in my pizza because I hadn’t slept at all the night before.  Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be excited for it, just don’t get too excited.  It won’t be very memorable if you fall asleep during your first slow dance.

The first step is to get the atmosphere at least not so terrifying for your toddler. Ordinary objects can appear extraordinary in the dark. The solution is to provide a night light or a few night lights. Fears about closets can be alleviated with closed closet doors and investigating the closet with your toddler beforehand. Make sure they have their favorite sleeping stuffed animal and blanket handy.

The next step is to get into some type of routine prior to the start of preschool. That means getting them ready for bed at the same time every night. This means the weekends, too, even if the big kids get to stay up. It might be tempting to let them stay up later. But if you aren’t careful, all of that progress you are making to getting them to bed on time can be wiped out.

The third step is to cut back on the stimulation as bedtime approaches. This is a little bit harder than it sounds. It means limiting the milk or juice and replacing nighttime drinks with water. It means cutting back on desserts or pushing back dessert time to an earlier time. If they must have a snack, stick to something that won’t give them a sugar rush. Cartoons can be stimulating and delay a child’s desire to sleep. Also, try not to stimulate with a lot of playtime before bed. Try more calming activities such as baths and stories told from books. It helps a great deal if you can tire them out before bedtime.

The fourth step is to be patient. This is probably the most important step. It will take time to get them used to going to bed. You may have to endure a few tantrums, fits, and getting in and out of bed. It can turn into a battle. But the most important thing is to be consistent. Eventually, your toddler will figure out that it is more fun to sleep in the big kid bed.

The big kid bed is a sign that your toddler is growing up. It can be a hassle but the rewards will pay off in the future.

Working and breastfeeding are very hard to juggle. Even if you have the most generous job when it comes to breastfeeding, you are still going to run into potential problems. There is the need to have privacy for pumping, the problem of storage, and dealing with potential leakage. It is an additional stress load on top of the stress from work, from lack of sleep, and from all the other stresses that life throws at you. It can simply be too much and too overwhelming.

Placing your infant in daycare might not be an option. Finding a decent daycare compatible with breastfeeding infants is very difficult. They have very special requirements to meet by the state license board. The number of Daycare facilities that provide this option are few and far between. It may simply not be practical to put your baby in a daycare center that is far away from your work and home locations.

Low milk production has a big impact on your ability to breastfeed. It is nothing to be ashamed of. There could many reasons for why your body isn’t producing that much milk. Stress is certainly one of the contributing factors for low milk production. Your priority is ensuring that your infant gets what they need. Such discussions are best left between you and your doctor even if someone else thinks differently.

Having more than one child does put a strain on your milk producing capacity. While you may be able to produce enough for one child, producing for two or more is an impossible challenge. You would have to be superwoman to produce that much milk. Most people understand this but there are always a few.

Breastfeeding is not a reflection of your parenting skills. It is a very personal decision. You don’t need to feel guilty for choosing the best thing that works for you and your baby.

Diapers – check…layette – complete…crib – ready.

Then, maybe during the night, when you’ve finally settled yourself into a comfortable sleep, or maybe during the day, as you reach for a file at work, your water breaks. Or you get a phone call or text from your loved one, her contractions have started. It is time, time to welcome a new person into your life.

You are ready, but have you truly prepared yourself for the always exciting, never-ending, completely exhausting, and utterly rewarding role of parent?

Check out my breakdown of the word – parent – below. I don’t know you personally, but I do know the following advice will come in handy as you embark on the fabulous journey of being a mom or dad.

P – Patience.
Making the transition to parent requires extreme patience. I guarantee there will be times when you feel that you’ve reached the end of your rope. Maybe you haven’t slept in what seems like days, or you don’t feel well, but remain patient with your infant. Soon, the grueling days will end, and you will be rewarded in ways you never imagined.

A – Acceptance.
Your baby has colic – accept it! Breastfeeding didn’t work out – accept it! He or she can’t sit up yet, but your friend’s baby who is the same age can – accept it! Life throws you curve balls, little snags you don’t expect. The faster you learn to accept reality, and cherish the amazing child you have, the better! Accept the baby, and accept yourself.

R – Rest. This means you! Both mom and dad need plenty of rest the first month after baby is born. You’ve probably heard this advice before, but it must be heeded. Rest when you can; being a parent is physically and mentally exhausting.

E – Enjoy.
Try not to take yourself too seriously at this special time. Baby will be fine. Not every decision is monumental. Sometimes new parents strive for perfection, instead of just enjoying their new little one. The first year of life literally zooms by, so don’t waste a moment being too hard on yourself.

N – Nurture.
Of course you will nurture your newborn. Don’t forget to nurture yourself and your relationships as well. Depending on your personality, you may only need a quick trip to the store to recharge your batteries, or you may need one night of uninterrupted sleep in order to feel better, but do nurture yourself. And make time to be a couple.

T – Trust.
Trust your instincts when it comes to your son or daughter. Only a parent knows what is best for his or her baby. You will receive both wanted and unwanted advice, so prepare yourself to implement useful information and to discard outdated or unwanted notions.

Congratulations – you are a parent!

Cutting in teeth can be very painful for an infant. Unfortunately, the only way an infant can relate that something hurts is through crying. So, determining that they are cutting in teeth as the source of their crying can be difficult to determine. But if the usual methods to soothe your child don’t work as well as they did, it might be  time to look in their mouths.

You should always consult your pediatrician for prolonged periods of crying or if your infant develops a fever or unusual swelling in the mouth. If your infant appears to be in an unusual amount of pain, definitely contact your pediatrician immediately. Any doubt about your infant’s teeth development should be discussed with your pediatrician first.

One thing most teething remedies have in common is the use of a cold compress. Cold is used to numb the area and provide a temporary relief in their mouths. It is best if you keep spare teething devices in the freezer for when they are needed. The type of teething device is entirely up to you and your child’s preference. You can use a washcloth or any number of teething toys that are available on the market. The key is to keep them cold.

Tylenol can also help with temporary pain relief. Always follow your pediatrician’s advice and the directions on the bottle when administering this medication. It is meant for temporary, not long term use.

Even though it is your infant that is in pain, you will have a measure of anxiety resulting from taking care of your teething child. First and foremost, give yourself a break. Don’t be too hard on yourself if the dishes are still sitting in the sink or the laundry hasn’t been folded. It is fine to let some things go to deal with your infant’s teeth.

Don’t be afraid to take that fifteen minutes in the shower while your infant is being watched in another room by someone you trust. It will do wonders for you and help you deal with the next round of crying. You need a break for yourself every once in awhile.

As partners, don’t be too critical when you return home from work and nothing appears to be done. Dealing with a teething infant is akin to sitting in rush hour traffic right after a big accident. It certainly has all the drama of dealing with coworkers who won’t cooperate on anything.

Your infant is going through a painful stage with teeth. There is bound to be some pain, a lot of frustration, and grating on the nerves. All you can do is comfort them as much as possible. However, it is just as important to take care of yourself.

“As for pacifiers at bedtime, the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) recommends the use of pacifiers in infants until around one year of age.  Pacifier use in infants sleeping on their backs is thought to prevent SIDS.  That said, most of us use them to help calm fussy babies as the sucking reflex is soothing.

Many infants and toddlers continue to use pacifiers to help sleep.  I often will encourage their use to help settle a young infant during the middle of the night to help get them to sleep through the night.  Once they become dependent on pacifiers though, their use can be a difficult habit to break.  Most babies continue to use pacifiers until up to around age 2.  Some toddlers will use them to the age of 3 or more.

By age one, many parents can simply take the pacifiers away, and this may end their use.  However, for those of us who are not ready to do so (and this included myself when my kids were young), I usually encourage parents to leave the pacifiers in the crib when the child awakens.  This helps to establish that pacifiers are only needed for sleep times and helps prevent the problem of the child always having a pacifier in his/her mouth.

For the toddlers age 2-3 who really love their “paci’s”, leaving a comforting “friend” behind can be difficult.  Talking with your toddler about a pacifier fairy coming to collect them or having a party to  gather all the pacifiers up to give away can be helpful.  If you play it up and offer the toddler a small present or surprise for giving up the pacifiers, they will usually go along.  They can even help to gather them up, make a special box for them, and leave them for the fairy to come to get them.  Or others have done this and had the child help to bury them in the yard somewhere.

As I learned from having my first child addicted to her “paci’s,” getting your toddler to give them up is easier than most parents expect.  With a little prep from the parents to the child and a parent who is ready, losing the pacifier at bedtime is really not that hard.  Work on a good bedtime routine, talk it up and usually this transition takes only a few days.”

I am not a major sleeper; I never sleep past 8 a.m., but I used to always wake at 6, so that is relatively late for me.  On the other hand, some of my friends will sleep until noon if left unchecked.  So, if you need to decide how long your child needs to sleep, follow these guidelines.

According to the Children’s Hospital of Chicago,  “There is no sleep formula for newborns because their internal clocks aren’t fully developed yet. They generally sleep or drowse for 16 to 20 hours a day, divided about equally between night and day… At 6 months, an infant may nap about 3 hours during the day and sleep about 9 to 11 hours at night… From ages 1 to 3, most toddlers sleep about 10 to 13 hours… Preschoolers sleep about 10 to 12 hours per night. A preschool child who gets adequate rest at night may no longer needs a daytime nap… School-age kids need 10 to 12 hours of sleep a night… Adolescents need about 81/2 to 91/2 hours of sleep per night, but many don’t get it.”

As a kid, I can say most of this is true, except these are all ideal. No preteen will ever get 12 hours of sleep willingly.  And as a teen playing sports and with homework, some days getting seven hours is a stretch.  Rather, I would suggest trying to get a regular schedule in place.  Every week day, I wake at five thirty and try to go to bed at ten.  On weekends (and Friday nights), I generally go to bed anywhere from ten to one and wake by eight.  Thus, I still get about eight hours of sleep a night.  But, I am also a schedule oriented person and don’t get my sleep pattern thrown off easily.

Sleep is a tough subject with any kid.  We always want to be up later, but we need sleep, often more than we know.  Remember, the numbers above are ideal and may be unlikely.

Now, before I begin, I will say I am a hypocrite on this subject.  I rarely study.  Not to hold myself up on a high horse, but I remember almost everything I read or am taught in school.  I am, according to many people, “very smart.”  Now, although I rarely study, I feel the majority of students should.  The problem with studying is that unless you are truly committed to it or can develop tunnel vision, you will quickly become bored or distracted.  Studying is simply a boring thing.  So I have a few tips:

• Study somewhere that you will be less easily distracted (NOT YOUR ROOM).  That way, it won’t be a day of you saying, “Ooh, shiny thing!”
• Also, no matter how boring it is to make them, flash cards work, and in my opinion, making them is half of the studying.
• Use study guides to determine what you need to study, not to study itself.  They are good at finding you weak points, not for memorizing data.
• Finally, get a good amount of sleep the night before the test.  Don’t cram, it stresses you out.

Also, here are a few more study tips from Dartmouth College:

• Study in chunks: 20-50 minute time periods followed by a brief break (5-10 minutes) is the most effective way to study.
• Use daylight hours: an hour of studying during the day is worth two at night! Do the work that requires the most concentration (typically reading) earliest.
• Rank your classes and be sure to spend time on your most challenging class everyday and early in the day.
• Study actively: ask yourself questions, review your notes regularly, discuss key concepts with peers and course professor.

So, before you take on a big test, try and remember these tips, they will help you succeed!

Recently, over on Idea Offer, Penelope made a post about this very subject and got some really insightful responses.

The winning response that she chose was from Zulfus, a self-described 21 year old:

As a 21 year old, I can tell you I completely relate to this. The issue is mainly due to 1 thing: late nights causing us to sleep in, because of genuinely not having enough sleep.

For example, I’d wake up at lunch, and get hounded for sleeping “all day”, though I only went to sleep at 5am, so had only had a pretty average 7 hours kip.

Also, as teenagers we’re finding ourselves, and rejecting values thrust upon us without logic, i.e. “Get up early every day, despite having no need to”. To us, it’s like “Can’t you see how illogical that is!? I might as well use the time how I want, rather than waste it being ridiculous!”

As for your question though, if you need to get your kids moving, the best thing I found was keep coming in the room booming at me to get up, not in a hostile manner, but in a “HEY! RISE AND SHINE! WAKEY WAKEY!” sort of way.

Once I’ll ignore it, twice I’ll tell you I’m up, but probably go back to sleep, though 3/4/5+ times, all around 3 minutes apart, I’ll start shouting and getting angry, but I’ll definitely be up.

The trick is to then stop when you’ve clearly got a reaction. Otherwise you’ll just cause too much anger, and it’ll be hard for the kid to let go and actually forget about it in an hour.

Other useful tactics involved switching the light on/opening curtains/opening the door.

Often times I’d be so tired I’d have never gotten up, but I’ll get out of bed just to close the door, because I want my privacy whilst I’m laid in bed. And by doing that I’ll be awake and getting ready anyway.

It’s got to push to get them moving, but then you’ve also gotta trust/respect/ease off at a point as well.

The part about this response that I find especially interesting is that it is all about guidance, but not being overbearing.  Teaching teens to be self-motivated is a key component of parenting.  And Zuluf’s response seems to be the right balance of nudging and giving space at the same time.