With so many toys to play with on the day after, you might want to consider putting some of them away until most of the mess is cleaned up. Consider putting away the toys that have the most potential for making a mess. The last thing you really want to do is try to clean up paint while trying to tackle cleaning the house at the same time.

Noise is certainly going to be an issue for you as a parent. There is only so much of the same repetitive song that can be heard before it grates on nerves and sends you over the edge. Your best bet is to quickly locate the sound buttons or distract kids with something else that is not so noisy. The coloring book and crayons might be a good choice to keep your toddler distracted for awhile.

This might be a good day to send the toddlers out with their grandparents to look at the after-Christmas sales for awhile. This will give you a little space to unwind from the general chaos of Christmas and perhaps clean up a bit. If they are gone long enough, sneaking in a little nap might be possible.

Don’t try to plan things for the day after Christmas. Give yourself and your toddler some time to calm down from the chaos. While seeing their faces on Christmas morning is well worth it, the aftermath is still a little stressful when you look at the mess and try to deal with a hyped-up toddler at the same time.

I’m a first generation American. My parents moved to the States from the Netherlands (well, technically they moved from France, but that’s a different story) about 20 years ago. One of the biggest cultural factors that my parents brought with them to America is the Dutch language. Frankly, it’s pretty darn cool to be raised in a bilingual household. I mean, how many people do you know that can speak Dutch? It’s like a secret language for my sisters and me (except of course when we visit our family in Holland). One of the traditions that my parents brought with them to America is the celebration of Sinterklaasavond (Saint Nicholas’s Eve) or pakjesavond (night of gifts) on December 5, which we like to call Dutch Christmas.

Sinterklaas is essentially the Dutch version of Santa Claus. (Christmas is also celebrated in Holland, but is more of a religious occasion, than a time to give gifts.) On the night before December 5, children put out their shoes or klompen (wooden clogs) by the fireplace (analogous to stockings), leaving a carrot/apple out for Sinterklaas’ horse. The next morning, traditional items that fill the shoes include kruidnoten (small, spiced cookies, pictured), speculaas, taai-taai, perhaps a mandarin orange, and other treats. That night, Sinterklaas and his helper, Zwarte Piet, leave a sack of gifts by the front door, though no one ever sees them come or go. For my family, it’s an exciting night filled with gift-giving and Sinterklaasliedtjes (Dutch Christmas songs).

Some might claim, “My family has been living in America for many generations. I don’t have anything else special to celebrate.” Many Caucasian Americans vaguely know their background. I’ve heard many friends say something along the lines of, “I’m 50% French, 25% German, and 25% something else.” If you know that much, you could set aside a particular day each year just to, as a family, look into where your family came from (not just locations, but traditions). If your roots only trace you further back into America, then that’s something else special to celebrate as well.

Doing some research to find out a special holiday that would be relevant for your family to celebrate provides a valuable cultural lesson and adds an extra day of celebration to the year. Now that’s what I call a win-win situation.

(U.S. Air Force photo)

So what does come in that box? The answer is a construction nightmare. The kitchen is composed of about a thousand pieces of plastic that have to be snapped off of about half a dozen plastic frames. Half of them aren’t even recognizable as kitchen parts. It will take you over an hour just to get the plastic pieces separated from the frames. After which, your hands will hurt from all that snapping.

After you get the pieces snapped apart, you then have to deal with the sorting and figuring out how they actually fit together. Yes, they are labeled but the pictures and directions don’t always match up. It will take another hour just to figure out how to put the kitchen base together.

You will also need at least a screwdriver, because not everything snaps together. It is also nearly impossible to line up the screws to fit into the holes. At times, the pieces don’t want to line up properly.

If you can get past the assembly nightmare of this particular kitchen, then it isn’t too bad of a kitchen. It is lightweight enough so that you can move it around the room.

It is made of easy-to-clean plastic. The sink is molded out of one piece of plastic so it will hold water.

The microwave is on the small side but the oven is a decent size.

The stove does come with lights and sound effects. It also pops out pretty easily to change the batteries when needed.

This is also one of the cheaper kitchen options available. However, the massive assembly project that this toy requires is quite daunting. Be warned before throwing this item into your cart, it can quickly turn into a nightmare. The last piece of advice is: don’t try to assemble this on Christmas Eve. It will make you crazy trying to put everything together.

First off, I want to say that once you hit 14 or 15, you shouldn’t be trick or treating anymore.  Once you hit that age, you are in high school, and it is inappropriate for high schoolers to be trick or treating.  Go have fun at your own Halloween parties.

But, if you are 13 or below here are some rules for a fun, safe night:

1. Do not talk to strangers –  I know you hear it all the time, but it’s true.  I mean, not all strangers are gonna kidnap you or kill you, there are some nice people out there, but it is better not to take the chance.  It’s fine to say hi to the adults handing out candy in their doorway, but if there is some random adult wandering around, I would suggest staying away.
2. Trick or treat in groups of two to five people. You will be safer in numbers, but more than five and you are sure for an argument.
3. Don’t eat any candy with an open wrapper.  Chances are that it is fine, but there is still a chance that there is a razor blade in it or it’s poisoned.
4. Be responsible with your outfit, don’t wear anything you wouldn’t wear to a friend’s house or around your parents.  If you are in a group and you are the only one with cleavage showing or having your dress barely covering your butt, you need a shirt or leggings under your outfit.  Also, if your friends picks out your costume and you feel insecure, make sure they know, because if you don’t, you won’t have any fun.
5. Wait till you get back to your friend’s house to start trading and eating candy.  If you are walking and eating and trading all at the same time I am pretty sure you’re gonna spill some — and kneeling on cold pavement late at night trying to find all the candy you spilled is never exciting, if anything it makes you fell pretty stupid.  Especially if your friends don’t realize you had to stop and you have to go chasing after them, believe me you will feel like quite the lummox.

If you follow these rules, I can guarantee you will have tons of fun on Halloween.  Believe me, I used to have tons of fun, and I followed these exact rules.

I came to realize that it had happened.

My daughter has transitioned from being a tween to being a teen, and the increase in expenses that comes with that change shocks me.

When I first dreamed of having children, the thought of loving and nurturing little ones thrilled me. Before I knew it, I had three wonderful kids to care for. Sure, I understood that it would cost a bundle to raise them, but I didn’t fully comprehend the enormity of those costs. I think reality hit the year I learned my oldest would need braces. That same year he would also travel to Washington D.C. with his school, and to Japan with a teacher. Ever since then, the expenses have kept coming. And the price tags keep getting larger.

To put it into perspective, the U.S. Department of Agriculture stated in August of 2009 that a child born into a family in 2008 will cost his or her parents about $221,190 ($291,570 when adjusted for inflation) for food, shelter, and other necessities until the age of 18. Mind you, that’s just necessities! The “fun” stuff is not included.

So, unless you have an extremely high paying job, or you have a trust fund, how does a parent of a teen (or multiple teens) afford his or her child’s many wants? It’s not easy! But I found a solution. Help your teen find a safe, age appropriate job.

My oldest found his first job at 15 in a photography studio, and my second oldest began working at 16 for a minor league baseball team; however, before their first “real” jobs, they babysat, mowed lawns, and coordinated garage sales to earn extra cash. Now, my youngest daughter needs to take a turn at earning money, so she is set to begin babysitting for a family friend next week.

There are many benefits for the teen that helps the family by working. First, he or she will learn the value of a dollar. (I bet you can remember the first time you truly earned your own money). Other benefits include learning interpersonal skills, negotiation skills, and even manners.  He or she will also begin feeling more independent.

As a parent, you will be pleasantly surprised by the effects earning a few dollars has on your early teen. It will not only help to increase his or her self-esteem, it will also help a child realize that “money doesn’t grow on trees.”  And in truth, a strong work ethic never hurt anyone!

How does a summer fun list work? It’s easy. Whatever the make-up of your family – kids, mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, aunt, or uncle – each person has a say in what goes on the list. All you need is a large piece of paper, and something to write down the many ideas with.

Jot down all activities that come to mind, from going to the beach to having a picnic at the park. Adults, who govern the family schedules, will want to include family vacation plans on the fun list, as well as any family reunions or special birthday activities. Kids, depending on their age, may want to list both simple and more outlandish ideas.

For example, one summer my precocious son proclaimed he wanted to visit to the Taj Mahal in India. Thankfully, our local library had a “Read Around the World” theme for their summer reading program that year; his wish to “visit” this fantastic building came true with the replica right in his own town!

Other ideas that make the list in my house every year include: a hometown parade, fireworks by the river, a visit to the old mill outside of town, a “bike hike,” a trip to the local Dairy Haus, German Fest, swimming at the Wisconsin Dells…as you can see our family has local favorites, and your family will eventually develop favorites too!

One point to remember is that parents/guardians don’t always have to be responsible for writing the list. Once my kids learned how to write, they have been in charge of posting everyone’s suggestions. And you don’t have to exclude the little ones. Younger children, who can’t yet write, but who can hold crayons, can decorate the list with cheerful drawings (or colorful scribbles).

What I have always made sure to include on the list are free, yet priceless activities. Who doesn’t want to catch fireflies with a four year old or pick wild black raspberries for a homemade pie? Other free ideas for a fun list include: running through the sprinkler on unbearably hot days, playing hide and go seek, having three leg races, and climbing (safe) trees! These ideas may sound corny, but some of our best family memories have been built around activities such as these.

Finally, writing down all the wants in a family helps to validate everyone’s opinion. No, you may not get to travel to the Taj Mahal, or jet to Paris, but each person will be able to do several things from the fun list, and what’s better than having fun as a family?

On New Year’s Day, I listened to peers my age, who ought to know better by now, gripe about their hangovers. I watched college football and started a new fitness routine (they really should make a Wii UnFit for people who aren’t quite ready for the Wii Fit). Again, I pondered the arbitrary selection of January 1 as the start of a new year and the implications it has to our children.

Kids do what they see, not what they hear. What kind of example are we setting for our children? Kids, from a very early age, are more perceptive than we give them credit for. I very much doubt that the children of hung over parents failed to notice something’s up. What message does that send? It’s never too early to start not glorifying alcohol for our children.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions. If I did, there’d be something about being a better role model for my sons in there. Something about showing them how to be men, spending more time outside and less in front of the TV, and giving the kids every opportunity I can.

There’s nothing magical about the date on the calendar, but the turn of the new year is a good time to reflect on who you’ve been and who you want to be and what you want for your children. Now is a good time to make a commitment instead of a resolution. When we all look back on 2011 a year from now, let’s make sure we can see it as the year in which we connected with our children like never before.

• First of all, look back and prioritize everything.  This means that you look back and determine how much you want something, how much you need something, what it costs, and if you can get it by other means.  If you are like me and over-analyze everything, this is easy for you.  If not, just ask yourself each one of the questions.
• Once you have cross-referenced the list, you need to put the results to good use.  If you desperately need new shirts, you may not need to ask for it for Christmas because you NEED it.
• Now, look into how much you want something and its value, or cost.  You really should only ask for one or two large things and a few more smaller things, so determine what top the list at each of these categories.  With this, you can narrow it down to the appropriate items for each value.
• Finally, if you have leftover items you really want, you can subtly slip those into conversations with people not receiving the list, but remember the recipient of the list may pass some of the items on it around to others who are stumped.  Thus, you may not want to double dip into someone.
• When writing the list, you can’t be excessively blunt.  Don’t just go out and say, “I want this, this and this.”  You need to work the formalities in and be gentle.  At the same time, you don’t want to be too careful and dance around the subject.  At some point, you must dive in.  That way, you don’t list everything that remains AFTER YOU HAVE NARROWED IT DOWN.

Writing a Christmas list is a gentle art that will take practice and over time become a finely tuned skill.

One thing and then another, the party was never planned, then planned but delayed, re-planned, and finally held – four months after his birthday.  And it was great.  He got cards and gifts from his friends, despite us describing this as an un-birthday party and expressly telling parents that they did not need to bring presents.  We ponied up another gift even though he got the standard allotment from us on his actual birthday.  The grandparents came through with multiple presents this time around after showering him with gifts on the actual day.

Gifts aside, he got to be the center of attention and the belle of the ball four months after his big day.  It was an extra, a bonus day that made him feel special.  It was just like his birthday – cake, gifts, cards, well wishes all around.  A giant-sized play date with a dozen of his friends.  Not bad for a random date a third of a year past his birthday.

I’m thinking this could be a trend.  Why waste a perfectly good kids’ party on a kid who already has been overwhelmed with gifts, songs, cake, etc.?  Maybe we should have the family party on his birthday and the kids’ party six months later on his half-birthday?  He’d be happier.  We’d spread out the festivities.

Then again, “expectation creep” probably would set in within a few years.  Each party probably would grow until they were as big as the original.  Before long it would be twice as many gifts out of my pocket, and he’d start asking for a quarter birthday party in between the actual and the half.

On second thought, this year should be the exception, not the start of a new rule.

On the one hand, having the four year old tear around the office for an hour or so would be greatly entertaining.  He’ll be good for a few laughs, and I won’t have to do any work while he’s there.  Of course, no one else in my area will be able to get any work done, either, so there’s that.

The more intriguing idea is bringing my nine year old to work for a few hours.  He’s reached the age where he might, MIGHT, actually show some interest in what his dad does for a living.  But his school isn’t exactly bending over backward to accommodate Take Our Sons and Daughters to Work Day.  It counts as an absence, and they’re doing their regular work.  Basically, their ignoring the event altogether.

So, is it worth it to take him out of school for half a day?  I mean, if I just want him to see what I do at work, I could bring him in on any day of the summer, right?  So what is it about having a special day designated for the bringing of sons and/or daughters to work that makes me want to take him out of school this month?

Are you participating?  Anyone have any success/funny stories for Take Our Sons and Daughters to Work Days of years past?  I’m sure I could get some good material for the column if I bring the little guy for even an hour or two.  Something like “Why I’ll Never Bring a Four Year Old to Work Again”.  Yeah, the story practically writes itself.  This should be good.